A Caregiver Who Became Family

By: Meg-Gayle Dean

When Meg-Gayle was in primary school, her parents worked long hours and frequently travelled for business trips. During those periods, the home rested in the hands of Edlyn, a young foreign domestic worker from the Philippines who became the primary caregiver to Meg-Gayle and her sister. Though Edlyn’s role was practical in nature through the chores she helped out with at home, the relationship that grew between Edlyn and the girls was emotional. Over years of shared routines, outings, and moments of comfort, she became more than a helper to them. She became a constant source of warmth in the girls’ childhood.

Photobooth picture of Meg-Gayle and Edlyn at Timezone, 2010.

Comfort in the Quietest Ways

Often anxious when left alone, Meg-Gayle grew up as a child who struggled to fall asleep. Her family knew she could only drift off when holding someone’s hand—specifically, by rubbing their thumb gently.

When Meg-Gayle’s family wasn’t around, Edlyn spent a few minutes before every nap and bedtime at the side of Meg-Gayle’s bed, silently holding her hand. Meg-Gayle never had to say a word, but Edlyn did it because she knew it brought the young girl comfort.

“I’m 22 now, but this gesture is still one of the purest forms of care I have ever received,” Meg-Gayle said. “I’m so grateful to have grown up under Edlyn’s care.”

The Gifts She Left Behind

Edlyn returned home to visit her family twice during her time with Meg-Gayle’s family, and she never returned empty-handed. Before each trip, she would ask the girls for a list of their favourite songs. As a gift for them, she would get her brother to burn these songs onto discs and bring them back to Singapore.

Those discs still sit in Meg-Gayle’s possession today. Not because of the songs, but because of what they represented: thoughtfulness, affection, and the belief that the girls were more than just her employer’s children. To Edlyn, they were family.

A Reminder That Helpers Are People 

Meg-Gayle recalled Edlyn having a delicate flower tattoo on her wrist. Her mother later revealed to her that several employers had rejected Edlyn’s application because of that tattoo, something Meg-Gayle never seemed to be able to wrap her head around. Because to her, the flower tattoo wasn’t a flaw. It was a glimpse into who Edlyn was as a person. A young woman with a story, a past, and a personality that extended far beyond her job.

Edlyn often shared tales of her own life with the girls—her mistakes, her youthful ambitions, and the challenges she faced. She reminded the girls to be grateful, to be kind, and to grow up into good people. 

Edlyn also spoke often about starting her own business back in the Philippines. Eventually, after years of working for the family, she made the brave decision to return home and chase that dream. The sisters cried when they heard the news, but the family supported Edlyn wholeheartedly. They knew she was stepping into the next chapter of her life, one she had worked tirelessly toward.

It was only then that Meg-Gayle, still a child, realised something important: foreign domestic workers were just like everyone else—women with hopes, ambitions, and futures beyond the homes they were hired to care for.

A Gratitude That Endures

Over a decade has passed, and Meg-Gayle and her family have since lost touch with Edlyn. Still, Meg-Gayle often wonders how Edlyn is doing, whether her dream of starting a business came true, whether life has treated her kindly, and whether her sons grew up well.

More than anything, she remembers Edlyn’s words: “Live to be a good person.”

Though this letter will likely never reach Edlyn, Meg-Gayle hopes that somewhere out there, Edlyn knows she made a difference, and that her care, patience, and love helped shape the adult Meg-Gayle eventually became.

It is a quiet reminder of the lasting impact that foreign domestic workers have on the families they serve—an impact that is often unspoken but never forgotten.

Maid of Honour honours the resilience and sacrifices of foreign domestic workers. For more information on fair employment practices, please visit our Instagram or MOM's website.

Disclaimer: The stories shared reflect personal experiences and may not represent all FDWs in Singapore. Each story is told to encourage understanding and respect. Any material, information or views expressed are those of the organisers and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of any other supporting organisation.